Back in the 90's, I had a hobby of following my friends around at clubs and making them write bad poetry for me. The word poetry was used very loosely. Well, completely incorrectly would be a better term since it was also used for articles, completely fabricated self-help columns and random complete and utter nonsense.
These are the results of those (often drunken) ramblings.

Monday, April 18, 2011


By Aralis and Patty

So this was supposed to be

This hip and happening place

Well I guess it’s more fun

Than being shot in the face

With mace

But not much more

As a matter of fact

It’s quite boring

Well worth ignoring

I’d rather be home sleeping.

This seems to be the case with a lot of outings: the planning and looking forward and getting dressed up are actually a lot more fun than the actual act of being there.

Did Someone Actually Read This?

6775! I just looked at the counter and it says we've had 6775 hits. When the hell did that happen? The last time I looked it was around 500 or so and it wasn't that long ago. So far I have been operation on the assumption that the only people who ever come to the site are the ones that do it just to shut me up...cuz I'm right in front of them...demanding that they go look at it.

So where did these extra 6275 hits come from? Have people been stumbling into this blog without my prompting? Did they read it? And not one of them liked it enough to bookmark it that I still have only 8 followers? You people should at least write a comment every once in awhile or something! Would it kill you to acknowledge your presence? That is if you really do exist. Maybe it's just one really confused person hitting refresh a couple thousand times.

Sunday, April 17, 2011


I have no idea what the girl's name was. I guess she just looked like a Lizette.

By Aralis

Stupid drunk girl

Dancing in front of me

Doing stupid hair flips

You’re making me sick

You’re so tacky

You’re pissing me off

And you smell bad too

With your cheesy perfume

Winn Dixie brand

$2.99 a gallon.

I have no idea why I was so mad at this chick. From what I remember, my friend Sue was also throwing a lot of hate at her, but I don't remember if it was because she knew her or we were just being catty. Beer might have been involved. I do hate when the dancefloor is really crowded and people hit me with their nasty sweaty hair. That's disgusting. I'd rather strangers not touch me at all, but sweaty strangers are the worse. and I need space to dance. Get out of my way!'s starting to make sense now. And if she really smelled like Supermarket perfume, probably enhanced by the heat in the club, throwing that Winn Dixie smell around...well I can see now why we were peeved.

The Teacher

By Trillian


Why can’t you get to the point?

I want to have a joint.

No she didn't. .. but it rhymed.

There must be a better way.

To say what you have to say.

Such a monotonous tone

You must be overthrown

By Anthony Keidis perhaps

He was rather pretty...This was written about the time The red Hot Chilli Peppers played Lollapaloosa so Anthony Keidis was fresh in everyone's fantasies.

If not, I’ll take a nap

I don’t know, I don’t care

Just as long as you’re not there.

Apparently Patty had a really boring class...I don't really remember the details. Maybe someday she'll finally pop over here and tell us in the comments.