Back in the 90's, I had a hobby of following my friends around at clubs and making them write bad poetry for me. The word poetry was used very loosely. Well, completely incorrectly would be a better term since it was also used for articles, completely fabricated self-help columns and random complete and utter nonsense.
These are the results of those (often drunken) ramblings.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Terms of Endearment

By: Nancy

Dearie, lovie sweetie pumpkin

Muffie, love dove, babe and snukkums

Terms of love, names for lovers

Cookie’s crumb? Honey bun?

What crap!

Use your name

These words suck

If anyone ever says a word

In this manner to you

Or around you

Get out of the room

Cut the brake line

In the offending person’s car

And tell them to go to the store

For tacos

See what I mean? This woman could put Jane Austen to shame. Or maybe Jane Austen would just think Nancy should be ashamed of herself for writing this. I guess we'll never know.

I think those are supposed to be people kissing at the bottom. We had some really awful clip art and we used it constantly.

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